Diamonds deep within

At times, life throws such murky situations wherein we get stuck and wonder why me? 

There seems to be no possible way out. Still life teaches us to move on and still see the wonders of life that is within and around.

As a creative person, I have always struggled to fit into this "the worldly world".  In fact Utopian thoughts made me a poet and now being aware of such traits, I wisely adapt to situations that need my attention and care. 

Not everybody's reality of happiness match the ideal benchmark. Neither one should justify or bother to give explanations for such personal call. 

Many a times I have pondered that truth is much beyond reasons or formulae to fit in. One such example appeared to me when it was a matter of career journey of my son. I could relate his course of life if he had gone for stereo type that most of us go for to get best in best possible time to settle in life. Instead I encouraged him to honor his heart and go for Music, yes tough but soulful. Undeniably essential in our lives.

 Whole life I have been following the noblest ways to be good daughter, good student, good wife, good employee and good mother. In the whole journey of being good to others, I lost my essence of being original to myself. Rather than moving with poise to take time in taking decisions, I was also in a hurry   like the rest, to set my life into the best possible way to settle, getting good grades, timely job, find  a true soul mate and a child in time. Everything happened by God's grace the way I stipulated, only that much later in life, after these accomplishments I felt empty. Weird is not it?  Now when time has been so complacent to you, suddenly you feel mistaken. Something went wrong somewhere. And to figure out that my whole life went in a very topsy turvy manner, out of control , very unpredictable and dangerous. Yes dangerous cause I started to dare. To tread the path untravelled. Uncertainity has its own trigger points of anxiety and depression but it gives me the highs of feeling lively, essentially meaningful and at peace. 

I am at a point of life where uncertainity is at its peak, I have no idea how and where will be my next few months. My husband being posted abroad and my son trying to resettle in India, in a way I have contained myself between these two poles of my lifelines. This time I am maintaining space and honour for myself as well not to get into the ditch I fell into by becoming the so called ideal one. I have stopped looking for perfection nor do I judge others through any lens of  idealism. We all can be perfect in our own eyes without fitting into noblest ways of perfection. There is a doldrum of choices we make given too many choices. Whatever ways may seem to be coming for our well being, we go for it and then take a turn to make things happen the best possible way. This is how the game of life moves on. Whether we win or the other team wins is immaterial as long as the game is interesting. Life can be interesting but not necessarily ideal. I have learnt it and still learning. 

Coming to the point of selecting between heart or brain, we often ignore our heart and listen to our brain because for survival- reasoning is basic and essential. Heart takes a second seat till a moment comes when we start feeling too comfortabe to a point that comfort becomes boring and heart gets its chance to speak and acted upon. 

I cited an example to my son about how our decisions matter in long run when we see the bigger picture. I could visualise the scenario like this. Every youth is gearing towards their career path coupled with educational qualification, hard work and right techniques to succeed like practical aspects to function in the world. All these techniques are learnt mostly in the early years of life, then we usually get into patterns to follow or stereotypes. One such stereotype notion is to get settled as early as possible, leading to calculated paths of  faster success which obviously throws out the creative line as an option for a living. For those who go for it, are not only daring but also have given their soul a first priority than survival instinct. 

Suppose we run for steel which is the most commonly used metal in our daily lives. Its quite obvious and easy to get it, reasonable too. So the crowd is going for steel a very easy to get metal. Also because it is found on the surface level. The path is known and standard is already set for how useful it can be. There is no discovery, no adventure, but the success story is 100 % achievable. But for silver or costlier metal like gold, extra efforts need to be taken, plus the time invested. Creativity is like diamond, its hidden deep underneath many layers, and since rare, not many have also ventured for its discovery, so the path is quite unknown to many. Deeper the knowledge, higher the value. Not only to reach such depth, one needs courage, patience and determination besides indepth knowledge, techniques and incessant passion to go for it. Once one can fathom the true call which is again a life journey, one needs to instill immense faith on self & Almighty to make destinty its own. To stay stationed at a juncture of life where on the surface it seems fruitless to put further efforts because we don't get to see the immediate result, but mind it all trees does not bear the same fruits. Some fruits do take more time than others to nurture and grow. The longer time the valuable the fruit becomes at some cases. Essentially,  care should not be missing irrespective how much time it takes to grow and bloom. Creativity might not pay great in terms of livelihood but it does those magic which a doctor may not heal where science fails and miracles happen. Soulful journeys should not be discouraged for the sake of livelihood. In the process of nurturing our children, we are misguiding towards a gloomier future of soul less journey.

Today I am a proud mother of a creative son who might take his time to establish in the crowd of hustle bustle but his insight and talent is no match to what he has to bear for his sacrifices of not selecting the trend.

Right orientation

Have you ever observed, survival instincts gear us for the best to emerge. I noticed the same in a plant which was cornered in a small pot in a balcony so away from direct sunlight. The plant in its initial stage of growing up must have struggled with getting enough sunlight which is the core source of its survival besides water and mud. So the interesting part is that in its keenness to grow the plant started growing horizontally as against its usual upward growth. It kept growing this unique pay parallel to the ground till it reached the right point to receive sunlight directly. The very keenness of the plant not to give up or settle for ordinary, lead this tremendous task possible. In spite of its initial positioning which the plant can not do anything about, it started to take a course much difficult against its normal trend to defeat its initial disadvantage of being cornered and stationed at a poor position in the beginning. Instead it steered its direction of growth with grit and determination in the hope of a bright future, towards a direction which is beneficial to it in the long run in near future.

Sometimes in life, the situation we are put in is not ideal and there is nothing much we can do about it. Instead of sulking about it, if we look for solution there can be infinite possibilities. Its a matter of our outlook and insight. Both when aligned with hope, faith and courage, it can make wonders happen. 

Creeper & Tree

In life, we all need one another to some extent. Life would not have been interesting if it was to live life alone. 

I watched a creeper come up to top of a tree that for a moment I thought the tree was a flowering plant. However it was the flowers of creeper which could reach to such height because it has the ability to climb and it selected the tree, somehow the tree also allowed the creeper to thrive upon it. 

It would be wrong to say here that only the creeper is at its benefit but in helping the creeper to grow on it, the tree itself is creating an opportunity to turn into a flowering plant, so to say. 

Likewise, in our life, in an attempt to allow others to grow through us, one gets the opportunity to enhance one's essence. Had it been the false ego of tree that somehow allowing the creeper to grow through it, is its mercy or favor, then the tree would not honor the flowering part which has happened to flowering reality through the creeper only. Honoring other's presence for good in one's life is also a graceful way to discover one's existence.

Right reflection

 While I was walking in the morning today, I found the early sun rays are so life enforcing. It gave me a happy feeling & wondered how many of us can reach for such vibrancy!

I observed that some of the glass windows were reflecting sunshine in a way that for a moment I thought the sunlight was right there. As I approached a corner, I felt that the same exhilaration of watching sun reflected on window pane at a distance of some other building. This made me ponder how come Sun which is so powerful can be witnessed through  reflection at a point where Sun is simply not there but sunlight is reaching. How amazing! Is not it?

The same thing applies to our human experience of God. God is omnipresent, but only a few can absorb God qualities through dedication, faith and deep penance. Such enlightened souls become Godly and reach out to people who do not have direct access or abilities to experience God directly. So through pure souls  who have divine experience and are able to reflect God qualities  of giving and care become living examples of God. Though just a reflection, but they serve as illuminating source as good as the Original Divine. 

In the building where the glass of windows are reflectors of sunlight, there are other materials like concrete, wood, metal which are not reflectors. There is nothing wrong about it, just that the property is different and not suitable as reflector of light. But they are strong and long lasting than glass. On the other hand, the glass is breakable hence very careful to handle. 

Similarly in life, people who are soft, subtler and sensitive can witness unique things with original essence as compared to worldly people who are materialistic, rough and tough and more practical people. They may be successful but they miss out the subtler part, the real authentic life. They are more on the surface level and don't delve deep into other subtler realms.  When a glass breaks it becomes dangerous to others, same with broken soft people. In spite of vulnerability sensitive people don't stop to be humble and compassionate. If roses are soft and attractive they have thorns too. They don't stop releasing fragrance after being crushed. That is their essence. Don't stop being yourself in critical situations too. But set an example of authenticity. True reflection of Divine source where we have come from.

Life's vibrant colors

    Have  you ever noticed how the colors of leaves are variable of the same plant throughout various life stages. Its interesting to note that  as a very young leaf it is mild brown in color. Then in middle it assumes light green color and as it is getting mature it is pure green and brighter then darker and finally yellow after it looses its essence of life when it falls off the plant. As it lay lifeless on the ground it turns to brown which was the color in the beginning but now a bit flaky in nature. 

When examined in terms of color, we can see it has primarily three colors - yellow, red and blue

Early stage is Brown which is combination of  (Red + Green (blue + yellow) ) essentially all primary colors but in varied ratio

Second stage is Light green - ( Green (blue + yellow) + Yellow) when leaf is young

Third stage is Bright green then darker green when leaf is in its prime stage 

Finally the leave looses its essence and turns yellow when it is approaching its end and falls off 

At the end, the fallen leaf turns flaky brown and mixes with mother earth & becomes dust

Nature has its own way of depicting reality through every part of its creation, be it leaf where the vitality color is green and is lost after loosing life. 

The early stage and final stage are both brown in color signifying ignorance prevailing among human at its infancy and old age or towards death.

 Hence the color variation speaks volume about life cycle how color range affects or varies with life force. 

Nature is the best example for us to learn about life through colors.

SHAKTI

 So many voices

seeking, resolving, calming, reclaiming

All in one Self

Strong, resilient, evolving one.

The melody resounds 

in the harmony of choir

It rejoices in the spirit of Joy

Some silent voices lay forsaken 

in the shadow of remorse 

Unspoken words declares its void

Peace be there, words are meagre

One can stay in the dark 

for others to be seen in heaven

Let there be harmony & peace

to flourish dream like heaven

Flowers of elegance & beauty rejoice

seeping through the pain of sacrifice

Being the Shakti, 

the energy source of Universe,

The feminine power house

rooted in empathy & grace

শক্তি

হতাশায় যখন চারিদিকে কু কীর্তি র

 কুয়াশা ছড়িয়ে পড়লো 

তখন নারী জাতির শক্তি র আবিৰ্ভাৱ 

 

ক্ষত বিক্ষত  বিধ্বংশ শূন্য চিত্তে 

মরীচিকার বালুচুরি হতে উদ্ধৃত 

এক অপরিসিম বেদনায়  জেগে উঠলো 

অপ্রতিম স্ত্রী শক্তির প্রতিমার 

রুদ্ধ কণ্ঠস্বরে 

নির্মল কোমল হৃদয় দিয়ে যে 

ভালোবাসতে জানে 

নির্দ্বিধায় প্রেম করে 

উন্নত জগতের স্বপ্ন দেখে 

সে আজ ক্লান্ত 

অতি সাধারণের অভিপ্রায় সে জানতো 

তবু ও আশা ছিল ভালোবাসা ছিল 

মানুষের প্রতি অগাধ ভরসা ছিল 

নষ্ট প্রকৃতির কিছু মানুষ 

এ প্রজাতিকে ধ্বংশ করতে উদ্যত 

অজান্তে করে চলেছে অনবরত পাপ যত 

এই ভ্রান্তি তাদের ঘুচুক 

অত সহজে পার পে যাবে সব মস্তানগুলো 

 

নরক করে রেখেছে এ মর্ত  লোক  

সীমা হীন কুকর্মে রত 

ধর্মের কোনো স্থান নেই তাদের বিচারে 

তাই বুঝি ভুলে গেছে শাস্তি আছে অবিচারে 

 মায়ার লীলা যদি হয় নিত্তান্ত

সে খেল আমিও জানি প্রভুর ইচ্ছার পাত্র 

আমার ও আছে ঠাকুরের প্রতি অগাধ ভক্তি 

ভয় নেই মোর জানি এটা ও তার শক্তি  

হোক না যত বার ই অনাসৃষ্টি 

জানি মা আছেন কাছে 

তার ধৈর্যর সীমানা যবে পার হবে 

তখন ত্রাহি ত্রাহি মেচে যাবে 

বিচার হবে সব আসল নকল  কার 

ভুলে যেও না এ মর্ত লোকেই আছে ত্রিকাল 

তখন অনর্থ কে কেউ সামলাতে পারবে না 

আসবে প্রলয় বিদ্রুপ সংহারে 

সাবধান যদি আবার দেখি ফাঁকি 

ছল প্রতারণার হিংশ্র আবেগ 

জেনো শেষবারের মতন 

কাল চক্রান্তে নিম্নগামী ত্রাস হবেই হবে 

তাই যারা ক্ষমা প্রার্থী হয়ে শুধরোবে 

তাদের ছাড়া বাকি নরকের প্রাপ্তি পাবে